Get Goldberg; Oh, What A Rush!
GET GOLDBERG
TNA won’t ever get Stone Cold Steve Austin or The Rock. Neither will burn his bridge with WWE, which is where the real big-money comeback is should boredom or finance dictate. Ken “Anderson” doesn’t mean anything. Same with Rob Van Dam and Sid Vicious. Brian Kendrick wasn’t worth the plane ticket.
The guy TNA needs is Goldberg. Then TNA needs to use him the same way WCW did: As a one-dimensional killing machine who never loses.
Goldberg is no Vince Russo fan, but he HATES Vince McMahon. If Goldberg ever comes back – and it’s doubtful – he’ll come back to TNA. Goldberg is 43, young by current wrestling standards, and has been just visible enough in the various media to keep himself relevant.
Being one-dimensional is fine – if it works. Goldberg should have never lost in WCW. He should still be winning somewhere. At the very least, Goldberg should have kept winning until the fans didn’t buy into it. What the fans definitely didn’t buy into was Goldberg’s winning streak ending in the lamest fashion possible.
Vince Russo – the Pittsburgh Pirates of wrestling bookers – wanted to “add depth” to Goldberg’s character so he could take partial credit. Just like Hulk Hogan did when he volunteered to lose the WCW belt to Goldberg on WCW’s July 6, 1998 Georgia Dome Nitro. The show was well on its way to selling 41,412 tickets before that match was made – in fact, Goldberg had to “beat” Scott Hall earlier in the show to “earn” a title shot. But Hogan took credit for the house anyway, giving himself extra props for being unselfish, brother.
If a wrestler is over, and drawing, and moving merch, his character doesn’t need more depth. Goldberg wasn’t broke. But WCW still tried to fix him. Goldberg was the “real” guy. WCW made Goldberg just another fake wrestler. (Vintage Hogan, by the way. If he can’t elevate himself to your level, he’ll have the booker bring you down to his.)
Imagine this scenario: Goldberg debuts on Impact, squashing Samoa Joe the first night. Jackhammers that fatass right through the pavement. At this point, that would be the best use for Joe, anyway.
The second night, he jackhammers Hernandez. The third night, he jackhammers Matt Morgan. If those two were going to make it, they already would have.
Goldberg just keeps on winning. He beats A.J. Styles for the title. TNA builds toward a program with Angle, the other “real” guy. Then he jackhammers Angle. Do it until it doesn’t work.
Would it work? I don’t know. It would be light years better than what we saw on 1.4.10. It would be better than Scott Hall yelling, “Say hello to the bad guy.” Scarface premiered in 1983, for God’s sake.
I’ve never seen a top performer’s momentum broken as decisively and stupidly as Goldberg’s in WCW. I don’t know if he could recapture that.
But, c’mon, Mr. “Anderson”? TNA would be better off building talent already employed than bringing in mid-card talent cast off by WWE. All Mr. “Anderson” does is remind fans that TNA is second-string to WWE.
With Goldberg, there’s a chance.
You want to repeat history? A winning streak is still a winning streak. Tony Montana’s catchphrases just get moldier. But everything Goldberg did then translates to now. Hogan can’t do now what he did then. Goldberg can.
One problem: Goldberg overshadowed Hogan then.
Think Hogan would allow that now?
OH, WHAT A RUSH!
Direct from the blog of Jim Ross:
“I also felt that Mark Madden could have been a superb analyst if he had been provided the right opportunity as he was intelligent, very witty and caustic, all in a good way.”
Considering it came from the best wrestling announcer of all time, that may be the biggest compliment I’ve been paid for my work on Nitro – which was not “the right opportunity.” It was like being recreation director on the Titanic. Anyway, thanks to J.R. for a monster rush.
Staying with announcing, the idea of Bubba The Love Stooge replacing Jeremy Borash for backstage interviews is ludicrous. A) Bubba sucks. B) He’s a big fatso who will dwarf many he interviews. C) He’s been with TNA 15 minutes and he’s bitched and moaned more than I did during eight years in WCW (and I bitched and moaned an awful lot).
TNA often tries to minimize Borash. Bad idea. I guarantee nobody does more work for less money. He has the perfect size and look for interviews, and he does them well. He’s the new Gene Okerlund, and I mean that as a compliment. Borash is excellent. He should be featured, not diminished.
But that’s the Hogan influence. He and Bubba are buddies. Bubba is a very popular DJ, and he’s done a lot to keep Hogan’s name out there. Giving a friend a job is OK. Giving a friend a job that negatively affects your TV and depreciates somebody better is not.
But that’s TNA. TNA gives the people what they want. Except when it comes to the six-sided ring. When the fans were chanting, “WE WANT SIX SIDES!” at Genesis, Hogan didn’t know what to do or say.
By the way, with all this talk of “earning your spot”…how do you earn your spot in a fake sport?
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